7:35 p.m. ||October 12, 2004
Infidelity, Monogyny and Sex
The married man has not been bothering me since I "told him" I was uncomfortable with his little notes. However the whole thing has really got me thinking about infidelity. I have never ever cheated on anyone. Why bother? If you're not happy with someone breakup- don't stick around for convienence- that's not right. I am also so disappointed. I always thought this guy was so nice and all he wants is to fuck on the side, apparently his wife isn't good enough. I have now heard from others that he has hit on other women and even had something going with someone who used to work there. On the flip side it seems that D and I are only seeing each other. I asked him kind of casually if he was dating anyone. He seemed surprised and told me he was only seeing me. I am happy for that but I don't know if I am quite girlfriend status. Just how does one know when they have hit girlfriend status? Right now I am happy with what I have. I am not in love with him but am deeply in lust. I can honestly say that no one has ever made me feel as sexually aroused as he has. This guy is just incredible. I won't go into details but he is so intent on touching and pleasing me that I almost feel selfish. I did see him last weekend. He made reservations and took me out to a really quaint restaurant. After we played some pool and I stayed over. I don't mind staying there but his bed just kills my back. Oh and there's somewhat of a bug problem in his apartment. It's not that it's dirty but his neighbors is and they crawl in from there. The whole thing makes me very squirmish. I mean he pays more for rent then I do and my apartment has never had a creepy crawly creature problem. So I'm hoping he can stay over here this weekend. Besides, goddamn it, I still haven't christened my apartment- I just wish my asshole upstairs neighbor lived below me.
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